Your Happiness Factor

" Don’t change – stay right where you are"! Nobody said change was easy.  Change is hard It is uncomfortable and risky.  That is why most of us don’t change until change is forced on us.  We don’t change; even when making a change could make a huge and positive difference for us and those about us.  Most of us have a mindset that favours staying put right where we are – a “fixed” mindset. And fixed mindsets lack resilience.  Standing still and staying where we are, can present far more danger and risk in the long term than making a change. Changing that mindset So how do you develop a resilient mindset? You need to learn to challenge your own thinking.  Your fixed mindset will chatter away in your head, if you let it.   It will fill your head with negativity and erode your confidence.  That nasty fixed mindset will tell you that even if you wanted to change, you can’t do it!   You’re not bright enough! You'r...

Image via Wikipedia Coping with life’s problems successfully needs you to have realistic expectations. Psychologists call these expectations, and the judgements you make based on them, ‘appraisals’.  Things that happen to us aren’t a problem unless we judge them to be. Life is never perfect and problems, are a part of normal, everyday life. If our judgements (appraisals) are realistic, we’re much better able to deal with them and not let them throw us off-balance. The appraisals we make come from our belief system. If we hold unrealistic beliefs, then our judgements may not be the best for the situation. Sometimes we have unrealistic beliefs about what we must or should do.  We want to be “perfect”.  “Everyone must like me “or “I’ve got to be good at everything” for example. If you think about these for a minute, they are irrational beliefs. Who do you know who could really achieve them? Another approach! ...